"Meaningless, meaningless. Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless under the sun. What do people gain from all of their labors at which they toil under the sun? I have seen all the things that are done under the sun, all are meaningless, a chasing after the wind. " Ecclesiasties 1
Does anything really matter
Since Hurricane Harvey, I have been thinking a lot about these words from King Solomon in the Christian scriptures. It's a bit nihilistic, but nihilism comes easily in the wake of such quick destruction. A house that may have taken years to build was flooded in a matter of hours. All of the time spent choosing paint colors and fixtures and displaying art, all became irrelevant in a matter of hours. Possessions you spent a lifetime collecting and curating are flooded, soiled, swelled up, gone. When you go through something like that, a natural reaction is to ask, what's the point? Does any of it matter? What is really important to me?
Getting from sorrow to hope
It is easy to lose hope. So, what keeps you going? What gives you the motivation to rebuild, to keep living, to keep fighting? How can you get to a place of joy from a place of sorrow? Why bother when it will all turn to ashes? It will all end up in a landfill.
Joy is deeper and sweeter because you have seen suffering and loss
Many of you who have gone through painful experiences in life have learned that there can be joy even at the end of a very difficult season of life. And you may have found that your joy is deeper and sweeter because you have seen what it means to suffer and to experience loss.
Tomorrow brings wholeness and healing
Crystal Lewis has a song entitled "Beauty for Ashes." I love the redemptive message in the lyrics.
"He gives beauty for ashes. Strength for fear. Gladness for mourning. Peace for despair. When sorrow seems to surround you. When suffering hangs heavy on your head. Know that tomorrow brings wholeness and healing." Sometimes there has to be destruction before there can be rebuilding both literally and metaphorically.
This time of year, people start thinking about the new year and new year's resolutions. But for some of you, life is more about surviving. The idea of adding a resolution feels overwhelming. It is okay to feel down. It is a normal reaction to hard things. Be compassionate with yourself. You have had a hard year. You have survived a hard year in the best way you are able. That is enough.
Be compassionate and you will find good enough is good enough
When you don't have hope, remind yourself that even when you don't feel it, life will get better. We know from our history that after the rain, there is sun. After the sun sets, it also rises. It is just the cyclical nature of life. Believe in that cycle even when you don't feel it to be true. Lean into the hope.
People who love you will be light in your darkness
And when you don't have hope for yourself, surround yourself with people in your life who lift you up. Surround yourself with people who speak encouragement into your life. Surround yourself with people who support you and get you and love you. They will be the light you need in your darkness.
Choose hope. Choose to keep trying again tomorrow.
Lean in to 2018 with hope that in this new year, there is new life. There is always hope. Be compassionate when you struggle with the hard times. All of the individual moments of life are not going to be good, but we can find meaning by choosing to love and care for those who need us. We can find meaning by fighting to do the things we are created to do. We can choose hope, we can choose life as long as there is breath in our bodies.
A few more tips on how to be hopeful in hard times.
Life has a way of throwing curveballs at us, presenting challenges and hardships that can leave us feeling depleted and disheartened. But even in the face of adversity, there is always room for hope. It's in those difficult moments that we discover our inner strength and resilience. So, how can we cultivate hope after experiencing hard things? First and foremost, it's important to acknowledge and process our emotions. Give yourself permission to feel and grieve if needed. Then, focus on the lessons learned and the growth that can come from those experiences. Surround yourself with a support system of loved ones who uplift and inspire you. Practice self-care and engage in activities that bring you joy. Set realistic goals and celebrate even the smallest victories. Remember, hope is not about denying the reality of the challenges we face; it's about finding the courage to believe in a brighter future. With time, patience, and a steadfast belief in your own resilience, you can rise above hardships and discover a renewed sense of hope that propels you forward on your journey.
May the year bring you beauty from ashes, strength from fear, gladness for mourning and peace for despair. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
The advice in this blog is not a substitute for professional counseling.
OTHER THERAPY SERVICES WE OFFER IN HOUSTON, TX
In addition to EMDR and Trauma Therapy, we have other mental health services that we offer at our Houston, TX counseling office. Our services are available for adults, children, and teens. For individuals we offer Anxiety Therapy, Eating Disorder Counseling, School and College Counseling, Autism Therapy, Perinatal and Postpartum Treatment, and Infertility Counseling. As well as Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling, Parenting Counseling, Family Therapy, PTSD Treatment and LGBTQ+ Counseling. Our caring therapists also offer Career Counseling and LPC Supervision. All of these services are also available through Online Counseling throughout Texas.
Contact us at Wilson Counseling to find out more about our services or to schedule an appointment. You can find out more about EMDR/Trauma Therapy here. You don't have to go through this alone. We are in this together.
