In good times and bad, food is a reliable coping mechanism
When you use food to deal with stressors in your life, it can be really easy to overeat. Most of us use food to deal with both the good times and the bad. You had a great day at work, so you want to celebrate with food. You had a bad day at work, so you want to comfort yourself with food. Our Houston eating disorder therapists see this in both our eating disorder clients as well as non-eating disorder clients. Food is the main go-to for most people to deal with their feelings.
Food can seem like the solution to everything
Food can seem like the solution to everything that is going on with your life--it helps distract you when you’re bored, it numbs you when you’re in pain, and it lifts your spirits when you're down. It’s pretty easy in those cases to overeat to try to stuff down any negative things that are going on in your life.
Unfortunately, food won’t take away your boredom, loneliness, or stress for very long
The truth is that food does a poor job of taking care of your real needs. If you overeat to feel less stressed out, chances are you will still be stressed out after eating, but you may also feel bloated or guilty about your food choices.
How can you take care of your real needs without food?
Ask yourself these three questions *
“Am I hungry?”
Start by doing a body scan to see if you feel hungry. If so, honor that hunger by eating a snack or meal that will feel good in your body. If you are famished, you will need more food. If you're just slightly hungry, a smaller, healthy snack will do. If you are NOT hungry, ask yourself the next question…
“What do I really need right now?”
In other words, what need am I trying to satisfy by eating? People often eat because they are bored, anxious, sad, angry, lonely, or in pain. You can probably add to this list your reasons for using food to cope. If I am lonely and I eat a pint of ice cream, I am still lonely after the last scoop. Food is not the answer to everything. I wish it were that easy. Once you have identified your need, ask yourself the next question...
“How can I meet my particular needs?”
If I am feeling lonely, food won’t help. It may temporarily distract me, but that doesn’t last. If you are not careful, it can become a bad habit to eat every time you feel the pangs of loneliness. That habit can lead to weight gain or a poor body image and ultimately keep you from meeting your needs.
Make a list of ways you can meet your needs
I recommend you start by writing out your needs, such as loneliness. Then make a list of the things you can do that will help you feel less lonely. For example, I can call a friend, scroll through social media to see what other friends are up to, message people I know, contact friends to schedule a meet-up, snuggle with my partner or kid, etc. Make this an ongoing list that you can add to any time you come up with ideas. Then, whenever you are feeling lonely, start doing something from your list. If one thing doesn’t work, go to the next thing.
Taking care of your real needs can be a type of self-love
It is a wonderful thing to be intuitive enough to know what you need and to be able to give that thing to yourself. Following the steps above can help you lovingly care for yourself and avoid the bad habit of using food to cope when you aren't hungry.
If you are struggling to cope, having trouble with overeating or disordered eating, or needing help dealing with pain in your life, we have Texas therapists and New York therapists who can help. Contact us online or by phone at 713-565-0922 or find out more or to schedule an appointment.
*These questions above were adapted from Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resche. I highly recommend the book.
OTHER THERAPY SERVICES WE OFFER IN HOUSTON, TX
In addition to Eating Disorder Therapy, we have other mental health services that we offer at our Houston, TX counseling office. Our services are available for adults, children, and teens. For individuals, we offer Anxiety Therapy, Child Therapy, Couples and Marriage Therapy, Family Therapy, School and College Counseling, Autism Therapy, Perinatal and Postpartum Treatment, and Infertility Counseling. As well as EMDR Therapy, Trauma Therapy and PTSD Treatment and LGBTQ+ Counseling. Our caring therapists also offer Career Counseling, and LPC Supervision. All of these services are also available through Online Counseling throughout Texas.